God is so mysterious. Let me show you how…
Chad and C were in the same class together in elementary school. 
They met again later on in life as “grown ups” and became friends.
C and HeeJun rode together. That’s them in the middle.
After HeeJun’s accident, C adopted me into her family of friends. I remember meeting her at the funeral. She invited me over to dinner on 11/27/09. So did this guy named Chad.
I remember seeing his eyes. I remember he was rocking a child in a rocking chair reading her a story while we were eating pizza. I thought that was sweet. But I wasn’t ready to date. I was barely ready to breathe.
He was patient. He was understanding. He sent me flowers after we went for a hike together. I freaked out. Thanks to a lot of Godly counsel and prayer, I got through it and realized what gift, what a blessing this guy is and that I was ready to date.
He gets me, and that is a hard thing. He reminds me to breathe. There is no support group for dating a widow. I’m kinda nuts.
I told him after a few dates that I had big plans for us. I planned to fall totally and completely in love with him. 
Saturday, he proposed. I kept saying, “is this for real?” I couldn’t believe this was actually happening. I had to take a deep breath and tell myself to really BE in this moment. Soak it in.
He made us a book titled “Finding Joy Again and holding on to it”. It was filled with our pictures and our story.
The last page…I seriously didn’t see it coming. I thought he was just giving me an early Christmas present.
Can you believe God brought me here? I never would have thought. I was showing my friends the ring at work and we were remembering the days when they had to literally carry me out of the car to walk me through the parking lot. We were remembering the days where I would fall on the steps sobbing, where I woke up cursing every morning and couldn’t imagine life being good or happy again. Then slowly, God started bringing back glimpses of joy. My sister moved in with me. My Faith was renewed. I slowly began trusting God and forgiving others. If you have read this blog from the beginning, you can see it.
I think that as I was getting to that place,God gifted me with Chad, as a blessing. Not as a replacement or as a fix for the loneliness, but as a true reflection of Christ’s love for me, His mercy, His compassion and His grace.
I am astounded and I am going to hold on to this joy.
I am so thrilled for you. God has been doing more than you have asked or imagined, and I am have been so blessed and encouraged by your continued story. When I have had conversations with friends or people at work who have God issues or take what they have for granted, I am often reminded of you and sometimes share your story. Congratulations, sweet Erica. Many congratulations.
CONGRATS!!!! This makes me so happy, and filled with hope! Your ring in beautiful, and the proposal is so sweet!! Hugs and lots of love to you!!!! 😀
I am overjoyed for you.
Congratulations – that is wonderful!
Oh Erica you know I am so happy for you! Chad is truly a miracle, I am so thankful he came into your life! i love you girl! I can’t wait to see you over christmas and give you a huge congratulatory hug!
Oh the tears-you made me cry! 🙂 I am just SOO thrilled for you both! It was great talking with you last night! I was thinking last night how the thing that took HeeJun home to be with the Lord was the same thing that brought you and Chad together. It’s amazing how perfect His plan is! Love you!
I’m speechless, beyond happy for you, glad for the doors that opened and you allowed to remain so. I’m happy for the joy in your future, for the love that you know and can carry forward. Congratulations my dear.
I am so happy for you and happy for you both. Enjoy each other
I am SO TRUELY VERY HAPPY FOR YOU and your fiance! I only hope that kind of joy will be part of my life again someday.
I love the last few lines of this post. It could not have been stated any better, especially for us “crazy” widow/ers. Thanks for sharing. Congratulations!
AHHH!! Soo exciting!! Congrats!!! I love it:)
wow wow wow !!! You deserve happiness, your such a light in this world and it makes my heart smile to know that you’ve been blessed to find it again.
Erica,
I’ve been reading your blog for so long now, I don’t even know when I first happened upon it. I just remember always wondering how you ever found the strength to go on after HeeJun was gone. As time went on & I kept up with your posts, I wondered if you’d ever date again.. or LOVE again. I sometimes would imagine myself in your place.
Today, I’m reading your blog & I’m so full of happiness for you. You’ve found that love again & Chad seems so perfect! I think what grabs me the most about him is that he doesn’t want you to forget about HeeJun, he’s encouraged you to hold onto those memories & he’s never going to hold it against you. How supportive & loving! I also want you to know that I’ve taken a lot away from your story. I truly mean that. I just got married in April & after I read a post of yours one day, I realized that the “small stuff” is just that. I used to get so angry when my husband would leave clothes on the floor, dishes on the table, toothpaste in the sink… and one day I read a post of yours and it really struck a chord with me… and suddenly I realized that I’d give anything to have all those things back if anything ever happened to him. I took a step back and just starting letting it go. No more bickering. I’ve lived by that mantra ever since. So, THANK YOU for that wisdom. I wish you all the happiness you deserve in life ~ Congratulations on your engagement. God Bless.